My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
