Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize