We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Be still, my beating vagina.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Randomize
