I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
be right there i have to get my cape
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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