All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
