i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
