we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
There's even glitter on my cock...
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