I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
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I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
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You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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