Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Slut skills are useful in every country.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
