sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
