If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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