just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize