I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
