end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize