i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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