K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
