a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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