when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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