I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
