Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
