Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
birth control should be required to get into college
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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