problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
