I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Damn victory sex feels great
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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