Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
