Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize