are you so shy because you have an std?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize