Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Randomize
