your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
