What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
