I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
