Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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