quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
