Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
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