I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
