Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
