im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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