i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize