He is such a slut. More and more my type.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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