David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.