I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
