; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
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