Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize