I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
