it wasn't lemon gatorade
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Randomize