That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Randomize
