This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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