She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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