We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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