You made me cry and you don't even care
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize