Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
