Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
